Guess What I Got...

Umm... check out that one line... under "Bachelor of Fine Arts in Theatre"

"with Highest Honors"

Yeah. I didn't think I was gonna get it, but I thought I might, and I did. Boo-yah!

Back To Normal Posting

So now that the mystery is coming to an end... and hasn't been that climactic yet... I guess I could blog about my life.

So I have graduated, begun rehearsals, moved into the basement, attended my best friend's bridal shower, and just had a nice graduation dinner with family and family friends.

All very nice stuff happening. I have been auditioning for any and everything I can. Mostly for the experience and because I actually can now! So far I have been to 4 auditions. STATS: 3 callbacks, 1 TBA, and 1 show. So far, so good. At least I felt pretty solid about my work and myself at all of them. I actually love auditioning now, which is a good thing, considering I have to do it a lot.

Everyone keeps asking how I feel about graduating. To be honest, it hasn't hit me yet. It really felt right to be graduating now. I also feel that I am very lucky to be busy with a great day job and a great show to work on for the whole summer. When I have nothing to do, and I am not in school, and all of my friends are at least 20 minutes away... I will be sad. I will be depressed, and I will try to move to the city to be around people. The Fall is going to suck. It's gonna suck hard.

I am so thankful for my family and my friends' support. Everyone I speak to is congratulating me on following my passion and for pursuing the arts more than graduating. I am so lucky to come from a supportive and liberal community. Yeah Jews!

Basically, I am feeling very grateful. .. so thanks everyone.

When Stupid Actors Brag

I guess it's easy to get straight A's when you only take theatre and music classes. Anyway...

Final Undergraduate Cumulative GPA: 3.87

BFA - Acting

Guess what I did...

Yep.

Seniors, Seniors!

BEST BAR CRAWL EVER!

Cowboy Monkey
Brothers
Murphy's
Clybournes
Firehaus
Bar Louie
C.O.s
Kams
Joes

I am completely sober and completely exhausted. Love ya, and goodnight.

Math

this morning. damn. today is a day for recovery.

Virginia Tech Vigil

I went to this Vigil on the quad last night to pay my respects, be a supportive part of my community, and take some time out of my day to think about the horrific tragedy that was the shootings at Virginia Tech.

Unfortunately, this "interfaith" vigil was used as a commercial to join a religion. There were Methodists, Jews, Muslims, etc. All had about 5 minutes in which they explained their own religion, and said a prayer from their faith. The Korean Church played a pop song over speakers, the Jewish woman called the shooting a second Holocaust...seriously, seriously- what the hell is wrong with people? Everyone's speeches were so forced, and the whole thing was so hippie and cheesy. The turn out of students was embarrassingly small.

Luckily, though, the media was there to capture crying faces lit by tea light candles in Dixie cups.

Basically, it reassured me that organized religion is not for me.

P.S. Why did they release that kid's video, and give him what he wanted? Now we got stupid shit like this

Pomp and Circumstance

It's getting to be that time, people! I just ordered my cap and gown today. This means I will graduate... soon. All very exciting. The time is flying by, and that is just fine by me. However, I am sure I will be sobbing like a baby when it is time to go.

'S' is for Shitty

Hi. Today I feel shitty. I feel shitty about:

my body
my face
my singing
my acting
my clothes
my hair
my headshots
my personality

I hate these kinds of days. I don't know where they come from, or how I get to this place. It's like I woke-up and I was a new, shitty person for some unknown reason. I am full of doubt, and stress, and unhappiness. I have started comparing myself to others, and treating my acting like a school assignment. I feel like a freshmen all over again. I was in such a nice transitional place, but it all came crashing down somehow. I hope this passes soon.

***UPDATE 10:28PM*** I got to relax the rest of the day. I put on a little mascara, got a chocolate scone, and watched "Mean Girls" on TV. In short, I feel a little better.

It's Reefer Madness!!!

In a good way, though! This show is so funny and the songs are fun and catchy. My roommate's production of it was fabulous! His direction brought the fun, wit, and themes to the forefront of the show and it was stellar. I am just beaming with pride. My parents and sister made it in to see it and they loved it as well. The acting and singing are perfectly fit to the style of the piece, and the tech is wonderfully kitchy (sp?). The show is great on its own, but the music adds so much to it, rather than being put on top of it. Anyway, if you read this and live in town, go see it at midnight or tomorrow at 7:30, cause it's awesome and FREE!!! Also, there are brownies.

Judgement Day

That is one of the funnier bumper stickers I have seen in my lifetime. Seriously, though, there are 2 people in this world. People who "get it", and people who don't. And I have to say, I can only deal with the latter for about 2 hours tops. Let me try to clarify who these people are. Mostly, it refers to a person who focuses on the least important thing- details and never the "big picture." You know, that person, who doesn't know to stop the joke because someone's feelings are getting hurt or what they are saying will get them into trouble? That type of stuff.

In acting class we talk a lot about our habits, and who we are as people as it relates to the work. An interesting concept was being able to "let go" of your personality in order to become great. This was something I had never considered, and I never thought I would have to do. As the class began speaking about what they need to "give-up" in their personality, I started to wonder myself. Just as we were about to change subjects, it hit me. Hard. I have to let go of judging people.



To my surprise, I felt more at ease in rehearsals, and dealing in general with people almost immediately. I am not there fully, or even halfway yet, but at least I am aware of it and trying to change. In general, I have really been trying to take life as it comes, let go of expectations, and trust that everything will turn out alright. I am not being lazy, by any means. I just do the work and trust that I am prepared. Adding stress just does not help any situation, whether you are prepared or not.

Anyway, as of late, I have been beyond stressed. Mostly, dealing with adults who act like children, and young adults that act like young teenagers. Sometimes I just want to shake these people. Sometimes I just wonder what their childhoods were like. Other times I just want to drill a hole in my head...your Yiddish lesson for today is "hole in the head" or LOCH IN KOP. The 'CH' is the throat clearing thing, guys.

So, anyway, I am attempting to find my way back to being at peace again. I have to be disciplined enough to go to a place of "it will be O.K." especially when things get really stressful. Maybe more yoga would help....

Ciao.

My Tummy...

If you were to poke my tummy right now, it would feel like pudding...but please DON'T poke it. It is angry with me. I ate 2 1/2 big cookies with milk from that stupid Insomnia Cookie place. I paid about $8.02 with tax and tip to get 6 warm, delicious cookies delivered to my door. I think the money and the tummy ache are well worth it.

Goodnight.

P.S. On an unrelated note, FB and me are in a fight.

The Road Not Taken, or I Am A Living Cliché

I was driving back today from chi-town to the cornfields, and and the sky was blue in front of me and gray behind me. It created this beautiful lighting and these surreal clouds. I have always wanted to go on a long road trip with a few close friends, take pictures, eat shitty food, listen to mixes...ya know that sorta stuff. I am hoping to do something like that this summer. I dunno who or where or when, but I am gonna try to make it happen.

This trip back to Chicago was a reality check. Everyone is seriously asking how I am going to make money. It is the first time I actually felt stupid saying I am going to be an actor. I had to explain I was looking for a day job, apartment, etc. I really had a WTF moment. I mean WTF am I gonna do? I have put myself in a position of never becoming financially stable. I don't have any other real skill either. The only option for the future is to go back and get a teaching certificate. That is slim pickings. I have faith in my talent and work ethic, so I hope the right opportunity presents itself to me.

Luckily, my parents are very supportive emotionally as well as financially. They have been asking me about what other jobs I can do to supplement myself as I start out as an unknown actor in Chicago. I hate the food industry. It is so stressful. I think I need something like, office receptionist or filing or working at a book store. Anyway, I am hoping something unconventional comes up, that will pay me well, and let me make my own hours. That is the ideal anyway...and believe me, I know, unrealistic.

On other note Blades of Glory was much funnier than I expected. Will Arnett is very funny, and I wish there was more of him. Pam, from "The Office" is in it, and is also very good. See it in the theatres. I think an audience helps it out a good deal. I am excited to see Vacancy. I don't like gory movies, and this one looks to be an escape film. I normally don't do well with scary movies, but this one looks promising.

Spring Break is Evil

Everyone is always making plans to go places during Spring Break...like weeks in advance. I dread breaks from school. Especially one as deceptive as a week long break during the Spring. I know that I will take a few days to move-in, relax, busy myself with seeing people I need to see and doing errands that are easier to do at home than at school (i.e. laundry, hair cuts). Then I am finally ready for a break, and I already have to think about going back to school.

I avoided making any plans for as long as I could, until I was informed by my roommate it would be too late. So I booked a trip for literally 1.5 days to NYC to meet up with him to see some shows and some friends. I did this because



A. There was a great benefit show I wanted to see with such lovely ladies as Lea Salonga, Liz Calloway, and Maureen McGovern;












B. To see some of my good friends who live in NY; and finally









C. To break up the monotomy of me being frustrated with my parents and boredom at home.










Anyway, it turned out to be great. I also got to see "Company", which was fabulous. I returned with enough time to devot to family and friends, errands, auditions and a bit of relaxation. Look at me multi-task!

Today, however was the first day back at school. It was hard. Truly, it was. We didn't do too much in class, but we did discuss all the things we still need to do. All through break I just kept thinking about how after Showcase I will be done, and life will be grand. Oh my goodness. I just want to graduate and live in my parents basement and get an acting job and/or day job that will pay me enough to let me move out on my own. Okay list of stuff do to:

1.) TV/Film Class scene
2.) Fight Certification
3.) Showcase
4.) Recital
5.) Bob's project
6.) Little in-class assignments


Let's do this thing.

P.S. I am trying to figure out how to do different text with my MAC... any ideas as to italics, bolding etc?